9. Wood

1. Musical Style: Jackson Five-inspired '70s funk

2. Literary References: "Dancing in the Dark" by Bruce Springsteen; "Superstitious" by Stevie Wonder; every dick joke ever made by Shakespeare

3. Key Lyric: "Redwood tree, it ain't hard to see, his love was the key that opened my thighs"

4. Favorite Lyric: "Girls, I don't need to catch the bouquet to know a hard rock is on the way"

5. Taylor's Callback: Daisy from "Don't Blame Me" and "You're On Your Own, Kid"; "Wi$h Li$t"

6. TL/DR: Yeah, it's big...

7. Previous Track 9s: Should've Said No, You're Not Sorry, Enchanted, Stay Stay Stay, Wildest Dreams, Getaway Car, Cornelia Street, this is me trying, coney island, Bejeweled, Guilty as Sin?

First of all, let's dispense with all the giggly junior high-level sexual references, okay? Yes, she's singing about Travis's junk. Yeah, she's definitely enjoying all the sex. Redwood tree? He's six-foot-five, you do the math. 

God forbid a 35-year-old woman enjoys having sex with her fiancé. We've never heard of such a thing! How dare she sing about such things in such an open and vulgar way!

Sit down, Gladys Kravitz!

My generation was raised on Prince singing about Trojans and some of them used in "Little Red Corvette." We listened to Madonna sing "Justify My Love" and George Michael sing "I Want Your Sex." Everybody just calm down!

"Wood" is so much fun to listen to. If you listen to the beginning of the track with headphones, you will hear the song open with the sound effect of someone pressing "play" on a cassette tape player. What follows is directly reminiscent of the Jackson Five's "I Want You Back," with a funky guitar-bass-drum beat that draws you right into the song.

She opens her lyrics with a series of superstitious images—picking petals from a daisy (he loves me not), an unlucky penny, stepping on a crack, a black cat—that leads to the pre-chorus, in which the beat levels out into a groove that literally sounds "Superstitious," the Stevie Wonder classic.

More sound effects here, with two wooden knocks preceding the "knock on wood" line, another superstition, along with crossing fingers for luck, and as the chorus begins, wishing on a falling star, which is itself a callback to "Wi$h Li$t."

More superstitions in the second verse/pre-chorus, including catching a wedding bouquet (heh-heh-heh she said "hard rock" heh-heh-heh) and a magic wand (What? Is that dirty?). In case all of this has gone over anyone's head, she declares "you and me, we make our own luck" and then calls out Travis's "New Heights" podcast with his brother, Jason, where Taylor first announced this album.

Don't think that Travis wasn't just about to burst trying to contain his glee during that announcement. The NFL is a hyper-macho culture, and having your fiancé sing the joys of your "manhood" is gold medal-level hype.

So what's the point? First, as your favorite "English teacher," she's going to point out Shakespeare's dirty little secret that never got pointed out in your high school class but was the best part about taking the class in college: Will filled his plays with dick jokes. They're everywhere in both his comedies and tragedies.

Here's another Shakespeare link I forgot to mention in track two: Elizabeth Taylor played Kate opposite two-time hubby Richard Burton's Petruchio in a film version of "The Taming of the Shrew," which features this classic exchange:

PETRUCHIO: Who knows not where a wasp does wear his sting? In his tail.
KATHARINA: In his tongue.
PETRUCHIO: Whose tongue?
KATHARINA: Yours, if you talk of tails: and so farewell.
PETRUCHIO: What, with my tongue in your tail?

Much has been made of the lyric, "Redwood tree, it ain't hard to see, his love was the key to open my thighs." The sexual imagery is as obvious as Kate and Petruchio, but in order for a double-entendre to work, there has to be a double meaning, and this is the bit I think most critics are overlooking.

Redwood trees are tall, and Taylor's a tall girl, 5'-11" barefoot, and she likes to wear high heels. Many of her past boyfriends were shorter than her, and it's not unusual for some men to feel intimidated by a tall woman. Travis is much taller than Taylor, and quite broad-shouldered as well with his pro football physique.

She feels safe with him. Standing next to him, he's much bigger than she is, and I think she's saying that his love makes her feel safe. Yeah, the "opened my thighs" line is outwardly sexual, but metaphorically, it's opening oneself up in the most intimate way, not only sexual but mentally and emotionally as well.

Anyone who is a fan of 1970s-era funk-infused R&B is going to dig the music here. As usual, the bass line is fantastic, especially the upward run right at the "New Heights" lyric; it's a virtuoso performance. 

I love that she's so openly celebrating the joy of sex in this song. It's a perfect track nine counterpart to my favorite song from TTPD, "Guilty As Sin?" in which she layers the same level of double-entendres to sing about the joys of female self-pleasure. It's both a clever and beautiful song that questions the religious-based sexual hang-ups that plague our culture, and her voice is as sensuous as it's ever sounded.

There was a question then whether the object of her desire in "Guilty As Sin?" was Travis, but lyrically, it didn't even really have to be about anyone in particular, just a woman with a vivid imagination. There's no question at all about "Wood," however. 

Any man who recorded a song like this, such as Bruno Mars, Justin Timberlake, or The Weeknd (who all have, incidentally) wouldn't have raised so much as an eyebrow. But God forbid any woman sings about how much she enjoys the physical pleasures of sex! This may have been the point of including this song: she's tacitly making the point that she gets criticized for doing something for which a man would be celebrated.

Plus, and I can't emphasize this point enough, this song is my JAM!