And Now Our Watch Has Ended.

Game of Thrones is over. Taking that in is a bit difficult to comprehend; it's similar to the feeling I had when the Harry Potter book/movie series took its final bow, and similarly, there are significant problems (and predictable fan outrage) with the choices made for how it ended. The final Harry Potter movie made some choices to deviate from the book in ways that I never would have chosen, especially for the final battle between Harry and Voldemort. What was written in the book was perfect; the choice to change it made me feel confused and angry.

That page took six weeks to write

And probably the majority of Game of Thrones fans are likewise feeling confused and angry, but it's a feeling that lacks the same context, because George R.R. Martin's writing speed makes James Joyce seem like Danielle Steel (English majors are laughing their asses off right now...trust me). I'm not going to defend the series or try to make the case for why season eight was great. It wasn't. It was all just...okay; all the pieces were there, but it didn't POP the way the series always had before.

Fans need to let it go and accept that the promise of the first five brilliant seasons did not sustain itself through to the end. It happens. HBO is not going to remake it with new writers. That's one of the most stupid things I've ever seen from disgruntled Internet fan-trolls. But I want to have a kind of grief counseling session with fellow fans to try to make some sense about what happened, to put it in a more acceptable context, and to leave the experience emphasizing the parts that made it great in the first place.

Book vs. Movie

A movie, or even a TV series, is almost never going to be "better" than the original written material. The most amazing special effects are no match for the human imagination. Good movies are either faithful to the source material (Stand By Me, The Green Mile, The Shawshank Redemption) or make the conscious choice to deviate dramatically from the source to create something new (Netflix's The Haunting of Hill House).

Game of Thrones is unique in that it did both and neither. It was a mostly faithful and amazingly spectacular adaptation of Martin's first four books. Deviations from the books were justified either because the scope of the books was too broad (there's like a thousand characters) or some plot lines were stupid (Lady Stoneheart, and no, I will not argue about this). Clearly, this was the strength of the first four seasons.

David Benioff and Dan Weiss

In season five, show creators David Benioff and D.B. Weiss had to deviate from Martin's fifth book because a) they ran out of source material about halfway through the season, and b) Book Five is a convoluted mess where the story meanders more pointlessly than Dany and Ser Jorah in the Red Waste. Dany is mired in a political and military mess in Meereen, Tyrion is trying to escape from a brutal slavery, and some guy named Victarion Greyjoy (like TV's Euron with less personality) shows up out of nowhere with his sights set on marrying the queen...but Dany, not Cersei (who hasn't yet scaled the heights of evil she did on TV).

Essentially, Benioff and Weiss had to operate on Martin's planning notes, which as a writer, are almost never where the story itself ends up. What happens as a result of this structure is that the story becomes plot-driven rather than character-driven, which is the obvious criticism of the past two seasons. This leads me to my next point:

Development vs. Spectacle

Seasons one through six were all ten episodes long. Within the expanse of any given season, there would be at least two or three episodes in which "nothing happened." That is to say, fans with short attention spans and little to no experience in reading actual books complained that these episodes consisted of characters sitting around and talking...no sex, violence, or magic, just talking.

What do you mean,
"We're out of wine"?

Yeah, because that's how relationships are forged, characters are developed, and we become invested in one personality over another. The best moments throughout the show, for me, were the scenes where Tyrion and Varys were alone in conversation. Also brilliant (albeit detestable) was any scene where Littlefinger was talking to anyone.

People need to understand that the most significant moments in human history were nothing more than conversations. Jefferson talking to Adams about the weight of the Declaration. Lincoln talking with his wife about how he could possibly put the country back together. Truman talking with his advisors about the consequences of dropping an atomic bomb on Japan. Conversations. Talking. It's what leads us to the truly monumental actions of life.

These conversations were mostly missing from seasons seven and eight, which were only seven and six episodes long, respectively. In fact, probably the best episode of the final season was #2, in which all the characters at Winterfell sat around drinking, and talking, and screwing, because they figured this was the last night they would ever have the chance to do so. And yet, those same trolls complained that nothing happened, that they were bored with the lack of action (Jeebus, sometimes I hate the Internet...).

Those "filler" episodes in which characters could have monumental conversations were eliminated in favor of the huge spectacles of battles and special effects. This is why Dany's turn seemed so abrupt; had we been provided with even two extra episodes to develop this dark direction in her mission, it would have seemed more organic and less plot-driven.

Epic vs. Budget

I have to believe that HBO made the decision to limit Benioff and Weiss to two truncated final seasons for budgetary reasons. The story itself, properly developed, led us to these epic battles: the fight against the Night King and the Army of the Dead, and the War of the Queens. But without the proper "filler episodes" to justify how we got here, they seemed like set pieces.

They reminded me of the huge initial battle in Star Wars Episode Three (my most-hated movie of all time). It had hundreds of things going on on the screen at the same time, and it was all spectacular, and after about two minutes, I was bored. I'm not going to retcon the whole thing, but as a writer, it's easy to see how different choices could have been made.

Game of Thrones has always made good on the promise of epic spectacle from season to season. From the Battle of the Blackwater (still my favorite episode) to Hardhome (the most harrowing) to the Battle of the Bastards, these huge set pieces are an integral part of GoT's reputation. And season eight gave us two of them, both super-sized! But I feel like, at this point, the spectacle was both expected and too familiar. And they probably busted the budget to the point that the producers were limited to only six episodes, and clearly, it wasn't enough time to make it work.

If you only knew the power
of a Disney paycheck...

And although no one will ever admit this, I have to wonder if Star Wars itself didn't have something to do with the timing of these final seasons. Benioff and Weiss are signed to deliver the next Star Wars trilogy, and it's going to be a completely new story. Did pressure from Disney/Lucasfilm inspire them to rush through to the ending of Game of Thrones? No one will ever admit that if it did, but ask yourself...if getting to the end of GoT was necessary to helm the next Star Wars story, would you take shortcuts along the way? It's hard to say, but it wouldn't shock me at all.

How It Ends

So how do I feel about how it ended? It was okay. That's all, just okay. It was lunch at Arby's. Not spectacular, but okay (I like Arby's, in case you're wondering; if you don't, substitute your own middling fast-food restaurant in its place). I liked the outcome for all the characters in the way the finale presented it.

Jon got to return to the far north, the only time in his life he ever really felt free. Arya got to fulfill her dream of sailing past the western horizon. Sansa got to be Queen in the North, a position she was determined to get or die trying since Littlefinger sold her off to Ramsey Bolton. I'm not sure if "king" was Bran's goal, but if it wasn't, he was certainly the right choice.

#winning

My take-away from this final episode was that what is best for human society is good government rather than empire, and that's what Tyrion Lannister represents, and that's who really won the Game of Thrones. He made mistakes along the way, certainly, but that's what makes him the ideal person to govern the six kingdoms (Free North!) of Westeros. He thought that Dany wanted to be a Good Queen, but what she really wanted was to be the Targaryen Empress.

Empires require limitless expansion and a constant state of war, and they are always, always, always subject to destruction. No empire can ever stand. Look at human history...the most powerful and far-flung empires—Sumerian, Babylonian, Persian, Alexandrian, Roman, Ottoman, British, German, Russian—have all crumbled into either dust or a shadow of its former glory in the span of only a few years, in most cases. Dany's rule meant that the war would never be over. And that's what Tyrion could not stomach, what he was willing to give his life in order to stop. Empire means war. Peace can only be achieved through...talking...sitting across the table from someone else and having a conversation.

And that's why the last we see of Tyrion Lannister, the Hand of the King, is a boring, good government conversation with his Small Council. Tyrion has fought and killed when he had to, but his strength is his mind and his weapons are his words. In the end, he not only got what we wanted, but in doing so, he brought peace to a vast union of kingdoms that had known only war and chaos for the better part of a decade. If I'm going to celebrate anything about this final season and final episode, it's going to be the victory of words and rational government.

Nothing Ends Gracefully

Humans love fictional stories. It's why I'm a writer in the first place—because I first loved to read stories, I wanted to create some of my own, where I got to decide who lives, who dies, what happens. But more than that, I want someone to read my story and fall in love with my heroes and despise (and perhaps uncomfortably relate with) my antagonists. No Potterphile wanted Harry's story to end, which is why we're stuck with so much shitty fan fiction and retconning web sites...no one really wants to leave Hogwarts.

So what happens? Our stories end, and we mourn them, and we feel sad and angry that they had to end...just like life. The most-watched ending in TV history was M*A*S*H, but people need to remember that that episode was divisive and controversial at the time concerning Hawkeye's mental breakdown and the reasons behind it.

Other long-running shows, most notably Cheers, Frasier, Friends, and The Big Bang Theory, all ended years after many fans had abandoned the show, criticizing the declining quality of later seasons or pronouncing that the show had "jumped the shark," which in entertainment terms is a fate worse than death.

Probably the closest we came to perfection was Breaking Bad, but that show was limited to only five seasons, and the finale provoked about as much vitriol and criticism as Sunday's Game of Thrones finale did. The sad fact is that a perfect ending to a great show is as impossible to create as a perfect ending to a human life. The end is death, and death cuts us off from new experiences, leaving us only with memories, making us wish for just one more conversation, one more interaction, one more moment with the person—real or fictional—whom we love.

Game of Thrones is dead...on television. If George R.R. Martin doesn't die first, the books will end with the same manner of anger and confusion. It might be more satisfying to some fans than the course of the TV show, but the end will come, nonetheless. As it will come for each of our stories...

And now, our watch is ended.

"Game of Thrones": How It's (Not Even) Likely to End...

WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW!

Well, Sunday will be here before we know it, and I have no idea who the entertainment trolls will turn their vitriol on next, because there's never really been a series like Game of Thrones before. I would really like to see one of Stephen King's epic works get this kind of multi-season HBO treatment (The Dark Tower is a prime candidate, but my first vote is for The Stand, which could easily fill up at least four ten-episode seasons), but I can't see any other fantasy epic coming close what the GoT phenomenon has been. In preparation for the finale, I'm offering five different speculative theories (not to be mistaken for "Insane Fan Theories," which is the bane of my online existence...) on how the series is going to wrap up.

#1. Daenerys Wins the Iron Throne

Damn, Dany! You scary!

She's still got a dragon, thousands of Unsullied, and evidently a reserve Dothraki horde (?), and she's just shown that she's willing to straight-up murder a million people out of revenge for what was done in King's Landing to her family. Anyone gonna stand up to that? Anyone? Imp? Snow? Murder Girl? Darth Sansa? Yeah, didn't think so...

The drama in this situation comes from the aftermath of the annihilation of King's Landing. How does she get the endorsement of the great houses? They could talk about standing up to her, but no one else in the Seven Kingdoms had anywhere close to the forces Cersei brought to bear, and we saw how that went for her. They all stand in line and bend the knee...even Sansa...but the show ends with Jon and Arya going to back to Winterfell to join Sansa in forming a resistance to plan the overthrow of the latest Mad Targaryen.

#2. Daenerys Leaves Westeros

MHYSA!

She's not loved in Westeros, and while she thought it would be sufficient to be feared, her actions have engendered the kind of fear that breeds sedition and rebellion. The capitol city is in ruins, she doesn't want to rule from Dragonstone, and she may be a bit mad, but she's not stupid. She knows that no one really wants her as queen in the west, so why not go home and establish "New Valyria" somewhere in Essos? The governments she left behind are likely to flock back to her support, especially if she burns a few cities along the way to get her point across.

This would leave Jon/Aegon as King in Westeros. J/A declares Sansa as Queen in the North, granting them and Dorne full independence as allied kingdoms. Tyrion returns to Winterfell to ask Sansa to marry him again; she agrees, and names him as her hand. Samwell Tarly becomes J/A's hand, Ser Davos is made Lord of Riverrun, and the prospects for peace actually look pretty good at this point.

#3. Daenerys Loses to Jon and Tyrion

Still knows nothing

They all saw the destruction. There's no way they came this far, believing in her and her goodness as they did, to let this type of murder go unaddressed. You could see it in their eyes last week. They will risk their lives to overthrow her, and when their plot is discovered, Dany sentences them to die by dragon...Dracarys...but a true Targaryen cannot be killed with fire. Jon survives, and shockingly, so does Tyrion—it turns out the Aerys/Joanna rumors were true after all. Jon strides out of the fire and kills Dany, then takes over command of Drogon. I really want to see Tyrion and Sansa back together, so let's throw that part of the story in on this scenario, too.

#4. Tyrion Becomes King

Imp...I mean, Your Grace...

Jon won't betray his loyalty to Dany despite his actions, so Tyrion conspires with Arya to put Jon on the Iron Throne. Arya fulfills her murderer's prayer by "killing the queen in King's Landing," even if it's not Cersei. She kills Grey Worm and takes his appearance in order to get close enough to Dany to put a spear through her chest. When Jon finds out, he still refuses to reveal his true parentage and identity. Instead, he journeys back to the North to join up with Tormund, giving us our desired reunion between Jon and Ghost. Since the last three monarchs were all Lannisters, the crown is given to the last surviving Lannister: Tyrion, First of his Name, King of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Realm. Since I'm writing fan fiction now, Sansa comes from the North to be the Queen, and Arya becomes Queen in the North.

#5. What Will Really Happen

Wait until they all read my blog...

I don't know the details, but everyone on the Internet is really super-pissed off about the whole thing.

Come back next week to see if I got anything even partially correct!

 

The Queen is Dead...Long Live the Queen!

Do not read this blog if you haven't yet watched the latest episode of Game of Thrones, "The Bells."

Last warning, people...

Three out of five stars? "The Vulture" is a dead duck!

Watching the reaction from week to week to the latest episode in the last season of Game of Thrones is making me feel like Daenerys Targaryen flying a dragon over King's Landing...I simply want to set everything on fire. They complained that there wasn't enough death in the Battle of Winterfell; they complained about how the Night King died (did you want him to win?); now they're complaining about the turn of events in this week's penultimate episode, "The Bells."

The flash point for outrage seems to be with Dany's "sudden" turn to the dark side with her complete annihilation of almost every living creature in the capital city, King's Landing. She had already won the war, won the crown, won everything she said she was fighting for, but at that crucial moment, she set it all on fire. Now those who supported her—Jon, Tyrion, Davos—will turn on her, and those who distrusted her—Arya, Sansa—will actively seek her demise.

But is this unwarranted? Does this turn serve only for plot manipulation at the expense of character development? Not if you've been paying attention since season one. Several other websites have supported this dramatic choice, so these opinions are not unique nor original, but I do want to give a detailed description of three major story lines that made Dany's actions not merely predictable but inevitable.

1. She's a genocidal maniac.
Daenerys Targaryen is a stone-cold serial killer, a genocidal maniac from the get-go. She came to power as the wife of a Dothraki warlord, learning that politics is best served at the end of a sharp blade. She went from city to city throughout Essos murdering kings (Qarth), ruling cadres (Astapor and Yunkai), and entire cities (Vaes Dothrak and Meereen). Sure, she was doing it in the name of "freeing the slaves," but burning fleets of ships, cities, and thousands of screaming citizens has been all in a day's work for the Mother of Dragons.

Her army, the Unsullied, is stolen property. She made a deal with the slave master to trade one dragon for 8,000 Unsullied. After the transaction was made, she ordered the Unsullied to murder all the slave owners, then she had the dragon (which technically did not belong to her anymore) set fire to the slave master, essentially reneging on the deal she made. She's a liar and a thief as well as a murderer.

As an audience, we didn't mind when she did these things because it seemed like she was an underdog, a scrappy little girl who was trying to survive and learn how to be a queen. We also liked that she was killing scumbag slave owners and setting the enslaved populations free. But did she really make these cities better places after she left? And what did she learn from this experience? When it doubt, burn them all with dragon fire.

2. She's a spoiled, entitled brat.
Everyone hated her older brother, Viserys Targaryen, because he was a whiny bitch and couldn't have been a bigger douche even with a small fedora on his white-haired head. Viserys thought he deserved to be king just because his father had been king. How is Dany any different or any better? She's constantly going on about how the Iron Throne belongs to her even though she's not done anything in Westeros to earn or deserve it. Her only reaction to the news that Jon Snow is really her brother's son is that it threatens her right to the throne. Selfish!

She was Khaleesi because she was married to the Khal; she did not earn her position but passively received it. Her Khalasar grew through murder (see above). Her claim to the throne in Westeros is that she is the only living descendant (or so she thought) of the previous Targaryen king, Aerys "The Mad King." What else gives her claim in Westeros? The fact is that Robert Baratheon had been king for 18 years before his death. That's a pretty strong claim that the royal line runs down the Baratheon's now, not the Targaryens. In any event, she expects that all of Westeros will simply bow down to her and accept her as their rightful ruler. Except this is unrealistic, because...

3. The Targaryens are foreign dictators.
One of the reasons Dany fit in so well in Essos is that it is the ancestral homeland of the Targaryens. They are one of the few surviving families of the Great Doom of Valyria, and their customs are native to Essos. Many people on the continent still speak Valyrian (as does Dany), and they have respect for the concept of might makes right (see: The Dothraki).

Westeros is literally an entirely different country. It's all about the politics and the alliances—it's the very meaning of the title "Game of Thrones." Dany has no idea about all the centuries-old hatreds and alliances between the various families and houses, and to make matters worse, she acts like she doesn't care. Sansa and Tyrion both try to explain it to her, to help her understand that the way things work is Westeros is about negotiation, not annihilation, but it doesn't get through to her.

Aegon I Targaryen and his sisters conquered Westeros because they had dragons. Their descendents ruled for 300 years because of dragons. The only reason that Jamie Lannister could kill Mad King Aerys was that the old man didn't have a dragon perched next to the Iron Throne. If Rhaegar Targaryen had been able to fly on a dragon instead of ride on a horse, Robert Baratheon would have never dared to start a rebellion. If he had, it would have been a short one.

The Targaryens ruled through force and fear for three centuries. No one in the North wants to see that era return. Dorne certainly doesn't, nor does the Eyrie, Casterly Rock, or the people of the Reach or Riverrun. In fact, they were all thrilled when the Mad King was killed, despite their animosity toward Jamie "The Kingslayer" Lannister. Do you think Germany would be happy with Greta Hitler? Or Russia with Natasha Stalin? Dany has to rule through fear because there are no slaves in Westeros to free in order to love her.

Go crazy? Please. She was crazy from the start. We just really liked her brand of crazy until it came a little bit too close to home. Come back tomorrow for Predictions Guaranteed to be Wrong about the series finale.

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 10-1

#10: "Crazy for You" by Madonna (Album: Vision Quest, 1985)

My favorite Madonna song since it hit the radio ahead of its appearance in the high school wrestling movie Vision Quest, this has been a go-to slow dance selection for my wife and me for almost 25 years now.

#9: "Weekend in New England" by Barry Manilow (Album: This One's For You, 1976)

I could have put at least three or four other Manilow favorites somewhere in this countdown (and they would for sure have been included in a top 200, but OMG who has the time?), but this one has been at the top for me since I was ten years old. It starts simple but ends with such dramatic power, with all the characteristic Manilow touches—modulated upward key changes, orchestral dynamics, and his own vocal virtuosity.

#8: "In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel (Album: So, 1986)

It certainly would have been a great song on its own merits, but its placement and purpose in the Eighties romantic classic ...say anything puts this love song into the Epic category. Another brilliant track from his landmark So album, Gabriel adds a world music vibe to his own songwriting genius.

#7: "Mary's Prayer" by Danny Wilson (Album: Meet Danny Wilson, 1987)

I'm not sure how many people (other than Steve) are even familiar with this hidden gem from the late Eighties, but I bought the whole CD on the strength of this single. I didn't even care that the rest of the album was forgettable; "Mary's Prayer" was worth the purchase price (this was before the Internet, kids, when songs cost real money). There's a wonderful little touch in this song that kills me every time I hear it...go to about 3:00 in the video; they move from the chorus to the outro, and at 3:15, there's a piano fall that ends in a cymbal crash and the next line...it's so wonderful and brilliant, and it makes the whole song even more special.

#6: "Adia" by Sarah McLachlan (Album: Surfacing, 1997)

I think Sarah McLachlan has the most beautiful voice I've ever heard; yes, others are equally wonderful, but hers resonates with me above all the rest, and this is the most beautiful of her songs I've heard. "Adia" gives me chills every single time I listen. Her voice sounds like what it feels like to fall in love.

#5: "Simple Song" by The Shins (Album: Port of Morrow, 2012)

This song is miraculously wonderful, a happy accident unlikely to be repeated or duplicated by this band, brought to my attention by Steve Lewis in response to my confession that I was familiar with little music recorded after 2000 (mainly because that's when I became immersed in contemporary Christian music). Everything about this song is so brilliant, but three qualities resonate most prominently with me: a) the crazy, random-sounding guitar riff during the verses; b) the drum fills, measures and measures of snare snaps and tom thumps; c) the background vocals rising through the chromatic scale leading out of each verse (listen at 00:57 and 1:29). I could go on about the equally genius music video, but Steve's already done that for me...click here and go read it!

#4: "Girl Can't Help It" by Journey (Album: Raised on Radio, 1986)

With all of the other classic Journey songs to choose from, this is the one I go back to again and again. The opening song of their Raised on Radio album, I'm not sure I can quantify any particular part of the song that makes it such a favorite, but it has all the elements I love the most...an up-tempo syncopated beat, beautiful vocal harmonies, masterful guitar work, and lyrics that talk about the joys and challenges of love. It's more than the sum of it's parts, though...it really begins to soar from the bridge to the end, and I've never grown tired of even one note.

#3: "Under Pressure" by Queen & David Bowie (Album: Hot Space, 1982)

Here's a great idea...let's take a legendary singer with a distinctive, unmistakable voice and have him sing with one of the most innovative bands in the history of rock music led by another powerful, brilliant singer. There was no guarantee that it would work...big-name collaborations often fall flat. But this one does much more than that...from the break to Freddy's bridge, then the pass to Bowie bringing the song to the end...it brings me to chills and tears of joy every time I listen. It's a remarkable legacy to both singers, each of whom died far too soon for the rest of us.

#2: "Head Over Heels" by Tears for Fears (Album: Songs from the Big Chair, 1985)

I never would have guessed when I started this process that this song would have ended up so high, much less ranked ahead of my other TFF favorites. But the more I listened to it, the more I felt like I was rediscovering something amazing for the first time. Every aspect of the song is typically wonderful for Roland and Curt—the vocals, the guitar work, the mix of old beats with new synths—but what I find most appealing is the five chord guitar riff that happens in the chorus at "...find out" and "something happens" (first appearing at 1:16 and 1:21). That's such a small thing, but so brilliant. I also love the "la-la-la" vocals over the piano theme that leads to the outro. I don't think I'm going out on a limb to claim this as not only my favorite TFF song but also the best thing they've ever done.

#1: "Just Like Heaven" by The Cure (Album: Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me, 1987)

It should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me well that this is my favorite song of all-time, and it's been at that position since about the same time I met Amy. I had always enjoyed this song since its debut in the Eighties, but after I immersed myself in The Cure's music after 1992's Wish album (#2 on all-time CD list on this blog site), "Just Like Heaven" rose to the top and has never wavered. Listen to how the introduction builds layer upon layer of sound; it opens with drums and bass giving us that satisfying syncopation, then adds acoustic guitar, another guitar, keyboards, then lead guitar with the melodic theme, and finally, the inimitable Robert Smith. My friend Michael Tucker once called this "a perfect song." I concur to the utmost.

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 20-11

#20: "Kiss" by Prince (Album: Under the Cherry Moon, 1990)

So many different songs to pick from, but ultimately, this is the one that through the years has thrilled me the most. It's also one of Amy's favorites, so whenever where driving somewhere and it comes up on the stereo, the volume goes up even higher than our voices reach. At some point, the line from the movie Pretty Woman (where Vivian is listening to "Kiss" in the giant bathtub) is spoken: She—"Don't you just love Prince?" He—"More than life itself."

#19: "Rebirthing" by Skillet (Album: Comatose, 2006)

The last of three Christian songs on my list and the highest charter, this is the song the Skillet has closed their live show with at least the last four or five times I've seen them. Skillet live is a true experience for those who think Christian music is boring. I vastly prefer current drummer Jenn Ledger to the former drummer who appears in this video, and the band also has a violinist and cellist who perform live with them on this and several other songs. I'm not sure if "kick ass" is necessarily appropriate for Christian music, but it definitely applies to this song.

#18: "Find the River" by R.E.M. (Album: Automatic for the People, 1992)

Previewed in yesterday's countdown, this is the final track from Automatic for the People, and far and away my favorite R.E.M. song of all. There's nothing complicated or particularly unusual about it. The song finds the band expressing their southern roots, with the simple sounds of acoustic guitar and accordion the primary accompaniment to Michael Stipe's restrained voice. The lyrics equate the journey of our lives with the flowing of a river to the ocean, and along the way, we encounter various fragrant herbs and flowers, mixing joy with sadness all to the inevitable end—soul food for the musical heart.

#17: "Don't Dream It's Over" by Crowded House (Album: Crowded House, 1986)

A consistent favorite since it's debut in 1986, the song is a perfect blend of ballad-tempo pop with Neil Finn's distinctive vocals and that Sixties throwback organ sound. It's the kind of song that can make you feel happy or sad depending on the day. If I ever fulfill my dream of starting an Eighties cover band (musicians: PM me on Facebook), this will be the first song on the rehearsal call sheet.

#16: "A Letter to Elise" by The Cure (Album: Wish, 1992)

Songs about the end of a relationship are often angry (Martin Briley, "The Salt in My Tears"), bitter (Fleetwood Mac, "Go Your Own Way"), or miserable (Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam, "All Cried Out"). Of course, The Cure is going to do something much greater than any of that with "A Letter to Elise," in which the love and the conflict are both equally real, and the determination to live apart is tempered with the honest admission of the depth of the love that they shared. If this weren't enough, the instrumental bridge leads to a soaring guitar solo that almost transcends this material realm. This song is like a spiritual experience for the broken-hearted.

#15: "Common People" by William Shatner with Joe Jackson (Album: Has Been, 2004)

What the actual fork? Am I serious? As I've said many times before, rock music is about Sticking it to the Man, and I dare you to find a more angry and honest song about class warfare than this one. Under the guiding hand of arranger/producer Ben Folds, Shatner's spoken-word lyrical style is matched with the singing vocals of Joe Jackson in this remake of a previously forgettable version of the song by British pop-punk band Pulp. Give this one a listen. It's a screaming, enraged expression of what it means to be working class in a world designed by, for, and of the wealthy.

#14: "We Are The Champions" by Queen (Album: News of the World, 1977)

I've played this song after winning college intramurals in swimming, softball, and bowling. I've played it in 2000 when the St. Louis Rams won the Super Bowl. I played it in 2006 and 2011 when the Cardinals won the World Series. I have two more occasions to play this song that haven't been fulfilled yet, but if either of them come to pass, you'll know it, because I'll be playing "We Are the Champions" loud enough that they'll be able to hear it in St. Louis and Minneapolis.

#13: "Enter Sandman" by Metallica (Album: Metallica (The Black Album), 1991)

I wonder this: when Metallica sat together in the studio and listened to the final version of this song, did they realize how big it would be? I mean, yeah, they were famous, but this song made them household names. This song got played in places where no one had ever heard of Metallica. And because in 1986, a guy from St. Louis named Lou Viviano dubbed me "The Sandman" (a nickname that has stuck for 33 years and counting), this is also my theme song...my walk-on music...if anyone would ever ask me to walk on...

#12: "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears (Album: Songs from the Big Chair, 1985)

Overplayed, overrated, overexposed...yeah, yeah, yeah, I've heard it before, and you're still wrong. One of the reasons certain songs are considered great is because they have a timelessness, a quality of persistent excellence throughout the ages for new generations to discover. This song is played and performed over and over again because it's a truly amazing song, with new age lyrics over an old-school Motown-like rhythm, exceptional vocals accompanied by virtuoso guitar work. Sing along one more time, because this song will always be part of our musical culture.

#11: "Friday I'm in Love" by The Cure (Album: Wish, 1992)

Once again, The Cure defies their mopey, emo depression stereotype for an absolutely joyful love song. This one never fails to put me into a good mood, no matter how gray the day may have started. That eight-note theme that opens the song echoes again and again throughout the verses and the chorus, and Robert Smith is at his optimistic best. Seriously, Fridays are good enough on their own, but knowing your love will be with you through the weekend? Smile! Life is grand!

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 30-21

#30: "Nightswimming" by R.E.M. (Album: Automatic for the People, 1992)

The penultimate track from my favorite CD of all time, R.E.M.'s masterpiece Automatic for the People, this song is just Michael Stipe singing over a simple piano melody. Later, strings are added. The result is one of the most beautiful songs ever recorded, and it's the perfect lead-in to the closing song, which remains to be revealed on this list.

#29: "Galileo" by Indigo Girls (Album: Rites of Passage, 1992)

One of the qualities of music that most appeals to me is beautiful vocal harmonies, and this pop-folk duo delivers some of the best harmonies of any group. This song in particular appeals to me because of the lyrics, which with their focus on the idea of reincarnation generated an idea years ago for a novel that I'd like to write someday after I jettison my day-job responsibilities. 

#28: "One" by U2 (Album: Achtung Baby, 1991)

It's hard to quantify what my "favorite" U2 song would be; I've argued for years that U2 must be in the conversation for greatest rock band of all time, considering their length of continuous quality output with all the original band members. They are also innovators, changing genres and redefining themselves artistically long after other bands have burned out or faded away. "One" stands out above the rest because I love the slow burn of the song's pace, starting quiet and introspective and building dramatically to the powerful conclusion. It's a grand achievement for a band whose final chapter is nowhere near on the horizon.

#27: "Enjoy the Silence" by Depeche Mode (Album: Violator, 1990)

The soundtrack of my first year in graduate school at Mizzou, Depeche Mode's Violator album doesn't have one misstep in any of its tracks, and despite standouts like "Policy of Truth," "Halo," and the ubiquitous "Personal Jesus," "Enjoy the Silence" stands tall above the rest, the indicative archetype of all the qualities—synth-phonic richness, innovative rhythms, vocal virtuosity—that make Depeche Mode the legends of electronic music.

#26: "Dancing Queen" by ABBA (Album: Arrival, 1976)

I've never been more than a casual fan of the seventies supergroup, but even when my exposure to ABBA was only based on radio play, this was always my favorite song of theirs. But a night out dancing with my wife at Walt Disney World featured this song, and since that time, we danced together with our grandchildren at our remarriage wedding reception. There's no other song of theirs that even comes close for me.

#25: "Shout" by Tears for Fears (Album: Songs from the Big Chair, 1985)

The opening song to my favorite album in my collection, "Shout" comes straight from the band's experience with Primal Scream Therapy, in which participants literally scream out their trauma. For my friends and me, this was the soundtrack of my junior and senior years in high school, the song that got played every time we got in the car. The percussion moving like a skipping heartbeat, Roland Orzabal's masterful vocals and guitar solos, and the soul-crushing lyrics (...and when you've taken down your guard/if I could change your mind/I'd really love to break your heart...) all make this song a classic for the ages.

#24: "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns N' Roses (Album: Appetite for Destruction, 1987)

Two decades of ridiculous fighting among the band members, both privately and publicly, combined with the physical ravages of middle age pudge have gone a long way toward making us all forget how absolutely kick-ass this band was when they exploded onto the music scene in the late Eighties. I still think "Welcome to the Jungle" is part of the conversation regarding greatest hard rock songs of all time. I think it's impossible to listen to this song and not feel fired up to assault your fan base and wreck your career.

#23: "Be Still My Beating Heart" by Sting (Album: ...Nothing Like the Sun, 1987)

Had I been keeping track since college, this song would have been listed at #1 or #2 for years and years. As I've written on this blog before, college was an extremely lonely time for me during my undergrad years, and this melancholy tune was like an elixir that inoculated my sadness with the one that Sting sang about so poignantly. I still love the song, but happily, that youthful loneliness is nothing more than a memory.

#22: "Take You Back" by Jeremy Camp (Album: Restored, 2004)

This is the second-highest charting Christian song on my countdown out of only three total—I usually keep Christian music separate from my secular list, but these three exceptions are exceptional. The music on this track is the kind of expert musicianship that Jeremy Camp fans have come to expect, but the lyrics—a modern take on the Prodigal Son parable, my favorite of Jesus's stories—are what place this song so high on my list of favorites.

#21: "Woman in Chains" by Tears for Fears ft. Oleta Adams (Album: The Seeds of Love, 1989)

I saw Tears for Fears live at the Fox Theater in St. Louis back in 1989 on their Seeds of Love tour. They had Oleta Adams, featured throughout the album, on tour with them, playing grand piano and singing. To date, it's still the best concert I've ever seen. This song was the pinnacle of that show, and it's the magnum opus of this album. Songs like this are the reason why I love music.

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 40-31

#40: "Imperial March (Darth Vader's Theme) by John Williams (Album: The Empire Strikes Back, 1980)

Think about the past fifty years of film and consider what any of that would sound like without John Williams' music. Inconceivable. It's difficult to say what best—Jaws theme, Star Wars fanfare, Indiana Jones march—but for me, it's easy to pick which one is my favorite...it's the totally badass, kick-ass, coming to lightsaber your head off song.

#39: "Constant Craving" by k.d. lang (Album: Ingenue, 1992)

One of the most beautiful voices on earth, k.d. lang excels in practically every recording she's ever done. This album has the feel of an intimate concert in a small Paris bistro, and this song is far and away my favorite tune on the album.

#38: "A View to a Kill" by Duran Duran (Album: A View to a Kill, 1985)

Although the movie itself was terrible—Roger Moore's last bow as James Bond, and Christopher Walken playing a villain as if it were a comedy improv satire of Christopher Walken—this new wave title song from Eighties icons Duran Duran remains one of my favorite soundtrack songs, and it's also my favorite Duran Duran tune overall (although "Save a Prayer" and "Come Undone" are also worth mentioning.

#37: "The Mayor of Simpleton" by XTC (Album: Oranges and Lemons, 1989)

This is such a happy, upbeat tune about a man who knows he doesn't have much to offer but love, and isn't that a wonderful sentiment? The driving bass line in this song is simply amazing; it's almost like a second voice to Andy Partridge's lyrics. It's so rare to hear bass guitar featured so prominently, and it's one of this song's most endearing qualities.

#36: "Rock Me Amadeus" by Falco (Album: Falco 3, 1985)

Don't give me any gas about this song, suckers...I was right there in 1985 when this hit, and it went all the way to #1 on the charts for a simple reason: German rap about Mozart freaking rules! Sure, musically speaking, it's just ridiculous, but that's part of why it works so well. Like Nena's hit "99 Luftballons," it only works in German. 

#35: "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2 (Album: The Joshua Tree, 1987)

In a lot of ways, I consider the lyrics to this song part of my autobiography; the sense of seeking a higher meaning in life is part of what drives me in my career, my spiritual life, my relationships—what far too many people don't know about U2 is how their spiritual lives drive their music, and this song is one of the best expressions of their faith.

#34: "Crazy" by Icehouse (Album: Man of Colours, 1987)

A relatively obscure Eighties love song from Aussie band Icehouse, this song caught my attention from the first time I heard it (probably on MTV, which is how we got our new music in the Eighties). The vocals are impeccable, the three-chord guitar riff holds the song together, and the lyrics are typically unrealistically romantic for a pop power ballad. It's a perfect cheese appetizer.

#33: "Get Here" by Oleta Adams (Album: Circle of One, 1990)

God gifted us in this era with Oleta Adams' heavenly voice. Discovered in Kansas City by Tears for Fears, they brought her to national prominence with their album The Seeds of Love, which she capitalized upon with her own solo performances, punctuated by this extraordinary song.

#32: "Silent Lucidity" by Queensryche (Album: Empire, 1990)

Most people are unaware that this masterful song by Prog-Metal marvels Queensryche is about lucid dreaming—the difficult process of taking conscious control of the events and actions in one's dream (think Inception but in your own dream). I've done this a few times, and it's an amazing experience. This song almost always brings me to tears it's so beautiful...how many metal bands have the power to do that?

#31: "Third Symphony" by Aaron Copland (Album: Third Symphony, 1946)

I'm not sure if a four-movement symphony counts as a single song, but it's my countdown, so here it is. I discovered this piece in a college music appreciation course, and it's been my favorite classical music work ever since. The first movement sets the stage, the second movement is a frenetic marvel, the third quiet and pensive, and the fourth is like a revelation, with the declaration of the "Fanfare for the Common Man" (you've heard it, even if you don't know you have) eventually descending into chaos, only to explode into an epiphany of orchestral joy. Yeah, it's exactly like that!

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 50-41

#50: "A Wall I Must Climb" by Michael McDermott (Album: 620 W. Surf, 1991)

A favorite song since college and from a favorite album to listen to while writing, this song kicks off an album by an artist hailed at the time as the next Bob Dylan. That old nemesis of Greek tragedy hubris (combined with drugs and alcohol, also an old nemesis) derailed a promising career, but McDermott's still out there, playing and singing on the comeback trail.

#49: "Foolin'" by Def Leppard (Album: Pyromania, 1983)

If it's not immediately ringing a bell, this is the song before "Rock of Ages" at the beginning of side two on the original vinyl album. There are a lot of Def Leppard songs that are flashier and more popular, but as far as solid rock goes, this is at the top of the class for me.

#48: "Subdivisions" by Rush (Album: Signals, 1982)

There are many great Rush songs to choose from over their long and storied history, but this one has remained my favorite one of all. Like so many others on my list, this is a song that cries out against the alienation of modern suburban capitalist life. Musically, it features the absolute virtuosity of Rush's three master musicians. It warrants mentioning that Neil Peart is the reason I became a drummer in the first place. No matter how much I practice, play, and grow, he sets a bar that I must continue to climb toward.

#47: "Semi-Charmed Life" by Third Eye Blind (Album: Third Eye Blind, 1997)

This happy little ditty about meth addiction is driven by the juxtaposition between the dark lyrics and the peppy, upbeat melody of the music. All the songs on this amazing debut album (one whose quality the band never equaled) are worth a listen, but this one gets the edge over "Jumper" and "How's It Gonna Be" mainly because this is a karaoke favorite of mine. (Note: Steve Lewis will now conduct a seminar on why I should have chosen closing song "God of Wine" on my list.)

#46: "Overjoyed" by Jars of Clay (Album: Much Afraid, 1998)

I discovered this song on a cassette on a shelf in the printing company I worked for in 1998. I'm not sure what happened to the tape, but it's likely I wore it out listening this masterful album. Jars of Clay, like many of my favorite groups, builds complex layers of vocal and instrumental harmonies, and the chorus of "Overjoyed" exemplifies this quality at its finest. Unlike many other Christian bands, Jars of Clay express a sense of doubt within their faith that I have always related to.

#45: "Deeper Understanding" by Kate Bush (Album: The Sensual World, 1989)

In a career where her music can be described as beautiful and strange, this song may well be the most beautiful and strange of them all. Years before the movies Her or Ex Machina, Kate sings about a lonely woman who falls in love with a computer voice recognition program. Mysterious synthesizers are interspersed with computer beeps and buzzes, and her soprano vocals are supported with the harmonies of Trio Bulgarka, a female vocal group from Bulgaria. This song is a masterpiece.

#44: "Modern Love" by David Bowie (Album: Let's Dance, 1983)

That awesome backbeat in the rhythm section, the blazing brass and saxophone, and Bowie at his upbeat best make this my top pick over more familiar singles like "Let's Dance" or "China Girl." Bowie's was a talent that both defined and transcended generations.

#43: "Voices Carry" by 'Til Tuesday (Album: Voices Carry, 1985)

I tell people one of the reasons that I side with much of the feminist platform is because I have four daughters, and I expect each of them to be treated as equals to men in all situations. My nascent feminist streak, however, was probably first stirred with this video when she stands up and sings in the theater just to spite her asshole boyfriend. This song's greatness is timeless. Stand up, ladies, and don't put up with a man who treats you like that.

#42: "Solsbury Hill" by Peter Gabriel (Album: Peter Gabriel, 1977)

I'm usually not a fan of repetitive rhythms or riffs in music, so this is a bit of an oddity musically. The rhythm is a straight four-beat, with the acoustic guitar and strings repeating the same theme. What's appealing is how well this structure works with Gabriel's vocals, which seem at times more narrative than lyrical. Some music defies rational explanation; this is simply a brilliant song.

#41: "One Night in Bangkok" by Murray Head (Album: Chess, 1984)

One of the things I remember about this song when it first came out in the Eighties was cool and different it sounded. Head's spoken-word vocals over a strange, synth-heavy score and heavy percussion was strikingly unusual for its time. In retrospect, it's no surprise that a song from a Broadway musical scored by one of the members of ABBA would be so distinctive. Thirty-five years later, this song is still as cool and different as it ever was.

Top 100 Favorite Songs: 60-51

#60: "How Can I Fall?" by Breathe (Album: All That Jazz, 1988)

I'm going to get roasted for this pick, but I couldn't care less. This is one of my most beloved love ballads. Highly melodic, with an emphasis on keyboards, the lead vocals are simply beautiful. A one-hit wonder for sure, but one that has stayed with me for three decades and counting.

#59: "Land of Confusion" by Genesis (Album: Invisible Touch, 1986)

Phil Collins has become such a moribund balladeer in the past 20 years that it's easy to forget that Genesis was a great rock band, and Collins was (and probably still is) a terrific drummer. This anti-Cold War protest song, whose bizarre and creepy video lambastes both Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher as bumbling warmongers, is my favorite example of what Collins used to be.

#58: "Fortress Around Your Heart" by Sting (Album: The Dream of the Blue Turtles, 1985)

Sting's first solo album took many different listens before it sunk in for me. I'm not a big fan of jazz, and his solo work was so unlike The Police (which I understand was the point). But once it clicked, this became one of my favorite albums, and this song is by far my favorite track from this landmark work.

#57: "Sunglasses at Night" by Corey Hart (Album: First Offense, 1983)

Seriously, is there a better archetype for Eighties pop tunes than this one? Eerie synthesizers, distorted guitars, and earnestly powerful vocals—Canadian singer Hart had a few other songs that charted after this one, but this is the song he'll always be remembered for.

#56: "Red Rain" by Peter Gabriel (Album: So, 1986)

Some albums are so masterful that it becomes difficult to separate tracks in terms of quality, and few instances fit this description better than Gabriel's So album. "Sledgehammer" and "Big Time" are standout singles for both song and video, but this opening track, far more subtle and understated than the bigger hits, has always had a more profound emotional effect upon me. I love this song.

#55: "Synchronicity II" by The Police (Album: Synchronicity, 1983)

A truly angry rock song, this is a venomous indictment of modern suburban/capitalist alienation, with the contrast of Sting's harsh-edged vocals contrasted against the emotional futility of the narrative in the lyrics. I never imagined in 1983 that adult life would align with this song in such a disappointing reality. I always thought the working class would revolt before life got this bad; I underestimated the sinister foresight of the ownership class. It turns out you CAN fool all of the people all of the time.

#54: "Why Can't I Be You?" by The Cure (Album: Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me, 1987)

People who don't really know The Cure might dismiss them as a mopey, depressing band, and while much of their music can be darkly introspective, they also know how to create insanely upbeat melodies like this one. The Cure is far too innovative and artistically brilliant to be pigeon-holed into any particular category other than "genius."

#53: "It's the End of the World As We Know It (and I Feel Fine)" by R.E.M. (Album: Document, 1987)

Karaoke Level: Expert. Part of the fun of this happy little tune about the apocalypse was trying to suss out the lyrics without album liner notes (and years before the Internet made it too easy). My favorite part is Mike Mills singing "Time I had some time alone" in the background of the chorus; it's wickedly ironic and so understated. I don't think I can be accused of hyperbole when I say that R.E.M. is one of the greatest and most important bands in the history of rock music.

#52: "Born to Run" by Bruce Springsteen (Album: Born to Run, 1975)

Sometimes a song is so iconically associated with its artist that the greatness of the song itself can be overlooked. Sure, picking "Born to Run" is easy and obvious, but that's because it's still arguably The Boss's greatest song of all time. It's certainly far and away my favorite of his, and that's saying something about someone who rightly deserves the title of American Icon.

#51: "Sympathy for the Devil" by The Rolling Stones (Album: Beggars Banquet, 1968)

I watched with glee while your kings and queens

Fought for ten decades for the gods they made

I shouted out, "Who killed the Kennedys?"

When after all, it was you and me

…

Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name

But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game

Hell, yeah!